Sometimes I surprise myself with the wisdom that’s rattling around in my brain. I take no credit for creating it; I’ve simply filtered and retained good material over time. I do have a knack for discernment and storage, I suppose. And clearly I can regurgitate well, as evidenced by the volume of good posts I’m pleased to have produced this month through the daily blogging challenge known as NaBloPoMo.
Just today I cleverly told a friend, ” The whole ‘deal’ in recovery is figuring out that how we’ve always operated probably isn’t going to get us sober…and might even be part of the problem.” True, eh? A good one. Chew on that for a moment. I love a meaty recovery insight. As for this particular gem, I’m not sure if I can pinpoint a specific source or if it’s simply a mashup of lessons that time has demonstrated to be true.
Our challenge is to go beyond remembering and repeating helpful bits, and to actually employ them appropriately. Say them in meetings, post them in blog comments, share them as memes until the cows come home but remember to effectively draw on them instead of falling into old patterns. Otherwise they’re just words (no matter how many time they get repinned or liked!)
Yesterday I explained the Drama Triangle but can I over ride my emotions in time to use the tool? I confess that at this stage in my growth I am more likely to clam up under duress and then assess the situation later as I lick my wounds. Even still, this is progress. The old me would have obsessed about an unfair circumstances, stewed in anger, talked about it incessantly and become bitter. Oh, and I’d have drank at it, over it, through it.
Progress is good but it’s a slow process. It takes faith to keep from becoming complacent or frustrated – two opposite conditions that present equal danger to sobriety. Life isn’t perfect, so there are plenty of opportunities to use the many tools acquired along this journey. Hopefully through repetition they will come to mind quicker, eventually as second-nature.
Right now I use most of my tools retrospectively. My goal is to use them instinctively and avoid emotion-driven responses altogether.
That’s all for today. Just a little wisdom.