Calling all Mockers and Fabbers

As I write this, I am enjoying my very essential morning coffee. Not a day goes by without it. There must always be coffee in the house. There must always be fat-free cream in the fridge, and in case of an emergency I keep a can of condensed milk in the pantry. I have special packets for travel. Coffee starts my day and I would dread facing any morning without it.

If I had to give up my coffee, it would be a difficult change but I would likely transfer my passion to beautiful herbal teas or buy an expensive high-tech juicer and get all jazzed about carrots.

What I wouldn’t do, though, is worry “what will people think of me?”

I am closing in on two years as a non-drinker and I am starting to feel rebellious against the power that the stigma of addiction has over me.

I can’t blame society, though. I’ve perpetuated the thinking myself, I realize. I categorized non-drinkers into two types: those who can’t drink (read: had to quit) and those who won’t drink (read: fun-suckers).

It occurs to me that if I want people to insert another type – those who don’t drink (read: who cares why, we’re too busy having a great time) – I need to step up and REPRESENT!

If I am going to assume this mantle, I want some better language.

Abstainer? Yuck. I am not calling myself anything that has the word “stain” in it.

How did vegans get such a cool label? Who came up with that? Let’s put that type of thinking to work here. Let’s define ourselves by what we DO enjoy, not by what we have left behind.

Aquifers (those who prefer water)

Mockers (those who prefer mocktails)

Fabbers (those who are freaking fabulous without any booze at all, thank you very much.)

I am on the verge of a break through; ready to redefine myself completely and honestly, yet on my own terms.

I challenge you, readers. Let’s have some fun with this. How can we break the mold? FABBERS UNITE!!!

Leave your suggestions here.

About UnPickled

I am learning to walk without the crutch of alcohol. As I begin I am 1 day sober. Gulp. I drank in private and hope to quit just as privately. The purpose of this blog is to help make me accountable - just by following you will give me enormous support and encouragement.

Posted on January 31, 2013, in Getting Sober and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 66 Comments.

  1. You are right. We need a name for those of us who have chosen to quit drinking, one that doesn’t have any negative connotations associated with it. No words like “alcoholic” or “sobriety” or “sober” can be involved because they sound so somber. Yet it has to sound somewhat intelligent, as well. I will let you know if I think of something fantastic. : )


  2. Unpickled,

    I found your blog today after what has been two days of pure hell. Guilt, shame, rotten hangover, depression… I have been drinking for 26 years now. I will be 40 years old in 5 months I’m just getting older, more bitter and lonelier while drinking myself to death. I need to stop this. I have been trying to quit for years now. YEARS. I’m not sure what I typed in the search engine that lead me to your blog, but the word UNPICKLED caught my attention. About five years ago my therapist once said that I was not quite “pickled” yet, I was still a cucumber and I had a chance if I only stopped drinking then. Even though my sobriety did not last, those words always stuck with me. I love that you named your blog unpickled. After reading your words and some from the other readers, I have hope that I still have not turned the corner and am still a cucumber or I too can become unpickled. Thank you.


  3. I had my last night with my friend, Beer, on May 26, 2013. I tearfully told my husband that night that I was ending my relationship with Beer. He asked why the tears and I responded that it was like breaking up with a best friend that had been there my whole life, literally. Quitting has not been the hardest part though. What to call it and how to explain it to others has been the most difficult part for me. This past weekend, I went to a party for a friend and was so worried about explaining myself. For me not to drink to the point of oblivion would not be normal. The funny thing was that nobody except for my husband and two of myfriends knew. I was still my loud laughing, snorting, fun self. The only difference was that I remembered the whole night and felt great the following day. Since drying up, I have had some interesting responses.
    Here are a few:
    “Oh…(imagine a shocked face)”
    “You don’t have a problem.”
    “Just take a break and then see if you can just have a few.”
    “Then I must be an alcoholic too…glugg, glugg.”
    “Just one won’t hurt.”
    “I am proud of you.”
    “You are fun with or without it.”
    Instead of weekend binges with beer, I now enjoy sparkling water and couldn’t be happier. I am so glad I found this blog because I don’t know anyone who is an alcoholic in recovery – i think that is what i am??? People I know are in two categories, drinker or non-drinker, but not wives, mothers, and professionals who have recognized that alcohol is a problem for them. I guess what says it all is that I am sober and love it!


  4. I’m on my first Day 1, after fearfully flirting for a month with the idea of cutting back. Woke up in the middle of the night, looked for help and here you are. This blog is a godsend. I’m so relieved and delighted to find you all. Unpickled, thank you so much.

    As for why I’m not drinking, my answer will be, “I’m driving.”( It’s true, I’m taking the wheel.) When I’ve been drinking and heard someone say that, I’ve always applauded. Another demurral, true and easily accepted, is “I’m taking a break from drinking,” or the laughing “I’m giving my liver a break.” I have heard these phrases and only wished i could, too. My optimistic hope is that by the time people suspect you’re a non-drinker, you’ve already proven you’re fun and fab 🙂

    For a few years there, when one of our crowd wasn’t drinking, it meant she was pregnant. I led that charge, maybe I’ll lead this one too. It’s so encouraging to know you all are there. What a wonderful medium this is!

    Thinking of identifiers for us, I love “free spirits”. I aim to be an Invicta – unconquered.

    Out of the night that covers me,
    Black as the pit from pole to pole,
    I thank whatever gods may be
    For my unconquerable soul.
    ….I am the master of my fate,
    I am the captain of my soul.


    • Welcome, Invicta and thank you for your wise and beautiful words. Here you’ll find a strong handshake of hello that hangs on and pulls you forward; you’ve joined many fellow travelers. I can assure you your comment will be read by others who are a little further ahead – they wave and call you to join them. And something more….later today, perhaps tomorrow, in a month, and many times again after that….someone somewhere who also searches for answers will read your comment and see themselves. Drinking fooled us into thinking we were isolated and alone when really there are so many who understand and share the “unconquerable soul” (love that!). You are not only joining a community of beautiful souls who support one another, but also inspiring others to do the same. Lots of love to you and all the friends and readers of this blog. You keep me going every single day. It’s a circle of strength that we give and receive – I’m so grateful for all of you. Xo, UnP

      Sent from my iPhone


  5. I’m on day 4 and thinking ahead to activities that involve drinking. I’m known as a bit of a health nut (closet drinker) so I am thinking of saying that I am doing a cleanse….of course then I also have to avoid bad food at the event too!! probably for the best 🙂


  6. If you’d have offered me a Mocktail back in the bad ‘old drinking days I’d have thought you were mad!! Those were for the light-weights of course…these days I’m MOCKTABULOUS and actually remember my evenings and rarely end up dancing on a bar…..ok so I’m also older but still.
    Lovin ya my sober sistah


  7. I love your blogs. I also love the idea of a great name for us non-drinkers. ( I’m only on day number three) How about “free-spirits”? We’re “free” to put into, or NOT put into our bodies whatever we choose. We can be “free” of “spirits”. “free” of alcohol. We can choose to drink water, coffee, tea, soda . . . . We can choose to NOT drink alcohol because we simply have made that decision for ourselves, to be healthier, or for whatever reason. I like the sound of “free-spirits”. What about you?


    • “Free Spirit” is great – love it. I’ve also been saying – of all things – “unpickled”, as in “I’ve unpickled myself and it feels too good to go back.”


  8. My dear people, I wish that I could go and give each and one of you a big hug. Unpickled – thank you. Thank you so much for your blog, your beautiful words and inspiration. I read the entire blog from the beginning to the end, including all comments. I’m probably about 10 years younger than you, in very similar circumstances. My escape from work and anxiety was wine – and I stood idly as it progressed over the years, so much that I was deeply worried about where I was headed. I say was, because I recognized that something was terribly wrong and parted ways with my ‘lover’. It’s an on and off relationship. I quit for 10 months a year and a half ago, only to be slowly drawn back in, by an Italian vacation of all things, and it only took a few months to get back to a bottle of wine per night. I left my lover again. Like you, I never reached that disaster drunk stage – I don’t think anyone would realize there was a problem. But in my heart, I already knew I was playing with fire. I hated myself and I hated envisioning the future with this crutch. I’m plagued by anxiety – but wine only makes it worse. It took months of sobriety and clarity to realize this. I’ve done it before, it was very difficult, I had to watch myself like a hawk. But it is possible. Everyone, it is possible and you will not regret it!!! I applaud your honesty and feel a connection to you – in some strange cosmic way, and made that much deeper since I slowly realized that we probably live in the same city. It was like these little pieces of a puzzle feel together – of all the places in the world, it made me gasp. Maybe we even passed each other in the aisle at the store, or my little white car whizzed past yours on the way somewhere… We live in such a closed society, it brings tears to my eyes that you would open your heart and let us in. Keep strong, you are not alone!


    • Thank you for this beautiful message. I will now be waving at every white car and by the way, that’s why I drive as well so please wave back. Message me if you’d like to get out of our cars and go for coffee!


    • I’d seriously love to meet up and chat if we are in the same town – even just to congratulate you on your brilliance for figuring it out! Please email me and let me know if you’d be up for that.

      Sent from my iPhone


  9. Hi, Unpickled! My name is CJ and I’d like to contact you to ask about possibly posting about my dissertation (which is an anonymous online study about couples and alcohol use). Is there any way that I could contact you? Thanks so much!


  10. I have been having feelings of anxiety all day and have felt incredibly tired. It is almost like I want to become a recluse. It is easier to sit at home on my laptop than get out and about catching up with people. I am between jobs at the moment so I am a little bit directionless. The new sober me is not very outgoing. I almost feel like I have grown too old and wise in the last two and a half months. Does anyone else suffer from anxiety? Will it pass?


    • Coming Clean… Hang in there…You are still adjusting… Take whatever time you need…And feel proud of what you have accomplished xxoo


  11. God this makes me want to cry because every one of you is me. I don’t know how, but alcoholism snuck up with real stealth. In was fun for a long time, but now I actually feel my body dying. The final straw is my 16 year old son coming home drunk from a party on the weekend. His first drunken session. We’re so proud! Of course, it being the weekend I was myself passed out in bed after a couple of bottles of champagne and blissfully unaware of his stumblings, vomiting and head spins. The next morning my inner voice kindly whacked me over the head with a baseball bat and told me to get my shit together. Voice does that all the time, but it has never been this loud before. Alcoholism runs deeply in the family. I’m a high functioning alcoholic (which really means I am able to keep a job) but the men and boys in the family seem to fare much worse. I can hardly tell my children to drink responsibly when I never have. But the bottom line is, even if this is the start of the hellish rollercoaster ride that is alcohol addiction for my son, I’ve gotta get off the ride. Now. I too went to a few AA meetings years ago but I knew they would never be for me. This blog is very helpful. 2 days sober. Thank you. That’s what I really wanted to say xxx.


  12. I am into my eleventh week of sobriety after many many years of heavy drinking. I feel quiet and steady. I surprise myself that I am still going. I am loving cooking, reading and budgeting. The house is more organised and any arguments I have with my husband are much shorter and one sided. I do not fight back anymore. I know he is loving the new me!
    I am still not used to going out at night with a whole group of drinkers. Funny thing is that there are always another couple of non drinkers at the table. I see them ordering lemon squash or lemon lime and bitters. We sort of smile at each other quietly acknowledging each others sobriety. The nights are long and tedious once the drinkers start revving it up, repeating themselves and outdoing each other with stories. Hardly anyone really listens when they are drunk!
    Friends have commented that I look great, that I look much healthier. Because I am in my fifties it is important that I am a role model in my family. I want to be a grandmother who can be trusted. Thanks Unpickled. KK good on you! We are still keeping each other going!


  13. I am officially at the two week mark! Sometimes it feels easier to cave in rather than keep going strong. My tricky brain wants to fool me into forgetting how bad things were. I am still fighting off all of the familar ques that forced me to reach for wine, just like a knee-jerk reaction. Almost robotic! For instance; I decided to do a little bit of housework the other day. Boy, oh boy was it a challenge to not pour some of my “go-go juice.” I really could get a house clean on “go-go juice.” I had to resist. Another instance was a horrible day at work, so so so very stressful! In the past it was no problem because I sure had the remedy to fix all of the aches and pains when I got home. In this circumstance I would pour some of my “medicine.” But, I had to remain strong. I actually have to remain strong because I felt my body dying. My personal life was in ruin. My self- dignity was in turmoil. That is what I must not downplay, minmize or forget about. The tricky deceitful wine is trying to get me in it’s clutches again, by it’s luring and gripping powers. I must remain steadfast in my mission, strong in my journey and untethered by temptation.


  14. I’m as nervous as hell. I can already feel my resolve slipping as I dread my first evening out at a dinner/show as a non drinker (fabber :-). What do I have to look forward to?

    I’ll tell you what I can look forward to tonite:
    No hangover tomorrow, no argument with my husband, no embarrasing photo’s tomorrow, no cringe-worthy memories of arm wrestling waitresses, no memory lapses..I could go on.

    I don’t want to be THAT girl anymore. There in lies the thing, I am not a girl, I am forty. It’s not funny or sexy, it’s pathetic and sad to see a wife and mother (anyone) who doesnt have control. I hereby retire as the drunk blonde that drives home with a bottle of white wine between her legs after an office party.

    I’m nervous as hell though. Wish me luck!


  15. Whew! I have made it 5 whole days! I have reluctantly attended a dinner with my peers. Wine was flowing like a friggen waterfall. I used the excuse that I was a little under the weather. But, I did it!
    I am still suffering headaches, problems sleeping, and some uncontrollable outbursts over spilt milk. I sometimes miss who I was, than I am able to pinch myself and say, “the person you liked was the beginner drinker, not the final beast drinker.” I do not think I can ever be the beginner drinker again, but oh how I miss her! But, that was so long ago….It was the later drinker that was the beast, the great lyer and the person that was falling off a cliff in slow motion. Drinking wine has taken a few years off of my life, I am most sure of it. But, what I like now is that I am present in the moment. I am able to do normal afternoon tasks without sipping away into my lonely familar black hole. That balck hole is now a sunny bridge that I want to keep walking on.


  16. Hi DB
    I was like you 57 days ago. I knew that the only person who was going to have to sit up and take responsibility was me. I knew my character had been weakened over time after many years of very heavy drinking. I remembered back to almost thirty years ago when I stopped smoking. Cold turkey! I thought thank goodness I gave up smoking when I was 24 and not try now at 54 because my willpower is shot. Then I asked myself what made me so strong and able to give up smoking then and now as I try to give up alcohol I keep failing? I decided to give it another go and on Jan 6 I used the same will power that I had all of those years ago. It is amazing how I am discovering so many of my strengths that had disappeared over time. If you can get throughout the first week and see that you are still alive, you can still laugh, you can still have fun you will realise that you can survive forever without alcohol.Look at all of the bonuses. You can remember things, you can read a book, you can wake up fresh, you can blog on Unpickled and speak to people like yourself who are embarking on a new journey. You can discover the richness of humanity and plan to live a valuable, guilt free life.


  17. Hello, I have visited this web-site all day. I feel like I have just discovered the cure for cancer. I had a rough day yesterday. I woke up today miserable and saying the same prayer I have said over and over and over again. For some reason I started to look around on the internet this am and literally just stumbled onto this site. Unpickled’s life could be my life. And so many of the other bloggers. We all have such similarities in our stories. Alcohol started out for me to be flirty, friendly and fun. It than grew into a love, hate relationship.Than it was there for me disguised as the answer to stress and anxiety. And finally I am at the end of my rope with my relationship with my punisher . I have been to a few AA meetings, and just thought they were not for me. I was so shy to speak in front of others. I have also had days, weeks and one time a month long stretch of abstinence. Than the pull grabs me and I am taken again. Today is day number one. Again.


    • DB,
      You sound so similar to me. But, beyond that, I am on Day 1 today, and will take ALL of the power I gain when I read these posts, and carry on. It’s so comforting to know we are not alone.


      • Welcome Jessica! Make a list of all the reasons you want to do this and revisit that list every time you want to break your resolve.

        I write the number 5 on my wrist every morning, symbolizing the five reasons i want to quit. Simple reminder that i glance at whether im driving, working, doing laundry or about to steer my trolley to the wine section!

        When i have quit for one year i will have a beautiful ‘5’ tattooed on my wrist, small and subtle just for me a prize and a warning, a message from future self.

        All the best! Today is the first day of the rest of your authentic life!

        Love and Blessings


  18. I just found this blog. I too am a wineaholic. Once again, I have awakened on a Saturday morning wishing I hadn’t had that 11/2 bottles last night swearing I’m going to quit again. I’m scared too of being rejected by my friends. And of being a fun drainer. How did you get through the desire to drink every afternoon? The anxiety defeats me everytime. I can go for maybe 3 days and then my resolve breaks down and I’m drinking again. I am hoping to quit through the help of your blog.


    • It takes a bit but hang in there and pretty soon it gets easier and easier. It simple – don’t drink! – but it isn’t easy. One thing that helps me is to envision myself in twenty years if I had continued drinking, and then to create a vision of sober me in twenty years – I want to be one of those rocking grandmas who skis and runs and looks great and laughs and oozes joy! If I kept drinking I’d be sick and sour and weak. Or dead. If you like to listen to some real women talking about their recovery, check out Pop in your ear buds and go for a walk under the moon tonight and listen to those ladies! Think about your triggers, reflect on your patterns, and change up your schedule to try and remove some of the things that cause you to feel tempted. Stay strong, sister, and stay in touch. Would you be willing to consider a meeting – online or in person?


  19. Hi Fabber, by coming onto this blog and sharing with us your past rituals is very comforting to many. I used to finish a bottle of wine while doing the ironing. No more! I now look back in disgust at myself for being so deceitful. I was deceiving myself and my dog as she would follow me around watching me pouring , gulping and refilling my glass. Her little eyes would look up at me with such trust. I dread to think what may have happened if I had had to drive to the hospital, make an important life saving phone call etc. That past deception is the reason I am embracing my seven week sobriety.I can now still have a good argument but I make sense! I am interested in addictive personalities and wouldn’t mind looking into studying psychology or addiction treatments . This blog to me is the most powerful of therapies. By coming clean and blogging anonymously with others reminds me of the secret club I had as a child. We would only allow like minded kids to join and no one knew what went on in the tree house at the bottom of the garden.


  20. I have been a Fabber for 4 days and counting. I found this blog a few months ago and it really speaks to me. Because of this and also “The Diary of an Alcoholic Housewife” I felt inspired to write on my own about my own struggles. I would more call it journaling on whether to drink or not to drink. I have admitted to myself that I am in fact an alcoholic. I can’t promise that I will never drink again but I can promise that today I will abstain from alcohol and tomorrow I will try again. I agree with everyone though… Who wants to go parading around saying “I’m an alcoholic”?! Then everyone wants to know what all you did to screw up! Hmmm let me see, I black out! Saying you’re an alcoholic is like airing your dirty laundry. I don’t necessarily want everyone to know and let’s be honest, we live in a very judge mental society. There is nothing worse than someone else pointing out your mistakes and your faults. So, let us fellow Fabbers unite!


    • Flabber ….. How are you doing? Day 1 for me….


      • Sorry…meant to say “Fabber”, not “Flabber”!


      • I’m well, thank you for asking. Well today is a new day and a new struggle. I need to go grocery shopping today… My usual routine would be to go grocery shopping early in the morning and put a shot of baileys in my coffee (you know, just to get started), then I would buy usually a 6 pack of something fruity or a bottle of champagne so I can tolerate cleaning and doing laundry all day, then I would buy another bottle of wine to enjoy with my HBO and Showtime shows. By the time I open the red wine I’m officially drunk. I thought this was normal for “housewives” to have a little mimosa while cleaning. The only thing is my “mimosa” is a bottle of champagne. I’ve come to realize that’s not normal. So like I said, today is a new struggle. I need to meal plan without pairing Wine with it each night and prepare for the workweek with a solid head on my shoulders. How are you?


      • Back to day one…. I’ve ignored all the email notifications I have gotten from unpickled because I knew I would have to face the reality again. I feel like garbage and feeling pretty shameful.


        • Hey, don’t beat yourself up, its part if the process, i myself have slipped recently too and i feel like a heel. But if i were my friend i would sit myself down and say hey 1) you did it you can and did stop 2) i would remind myself how good i felt when i had been able to say no 3) self discipline is self care and i am worth it 4) today is a new day, life is long lets try again. This is hard, but not as hard as being eighty alone and ashamed unhealthy and broken, so lets just say cest la vie and try again and we will keep trying until one day it won’t be the thing that defines us, this person that we feel ashamed of now will be somebody we used to know. Hang in there Fabber! Thinking if you. Have a house full of drinkers coming today, nervous as hell but this too shall pass! X


        • Hey just sending you some encouragement. Just keep getting back up – most of us had a number of false starts before successfully making the change. Don’t beat yourself up!


  21. Merry Go Round
    You have to treat each day like you are climbing a mountain. It is hard, it requires strength but at night after dinner when you have a full tummy and are physically tired you can look back on your days journey with a sense of achievement. Another thing I do is think back to the shame and the fear of being caught sneaking bottles into the back of cupboards and think ” I don’t ever have to do that again”. The end of each day is the most liberating for me. Unpickled is my godsend at the moment. I love sharing and reading about everyone else’s battles. It makes me feelmlike I am not alone.


  22. So what does one do when it’s just too hard to stay strong?


    • Sometimes I start worrying dinners or events that I have coming up and wondering if I’ll stay sober. Well I’ll deal with it when the time comes but for today I’m not going to drink and tomorrow I will have to work at it again.


  23. I just found you and have read every single post you have written. That nagging of I must quit is starting to shout at me. Just reading how normal you are has given me quite a lot of inspiration. Thank you thank you.


  24. Milly, I hope you have been successful with your decision to stop drinking. Today is my first day on this very important journey. I have found this blog to be very supportive and inspirational as well. Here’s to our success and the success of all the others!!!!


  25. Thanks unpickled for all of your story. It reminded me of me. For the past year I have tried to quit or cut down thinking I could get control. I finally decided to stop lying to myself and tell myself I just have to quit. Although I have the support of my fiance, it will be much harder because he is an everynight drinker as well. I will continue to re-read your blogs for support and inspiration as I begin this much needed journey.


  26. Soberholics
    Cool to be addicted !

    Sent from my iPhone


  27. Hey Unpickled! I’m finally a Fabber! I’ve been fab almost 4 months now. I just want to say thanks for being you. More than a year ago you would check in on me, make sure I was hanging in there. I never forgot your kindness. You most certainly are a fabulous Fabber. Rock on!


  28. Another vote for ‘Fabbers’ here!!

    But it is actually an issue, right? Like, I have been sober for 8+ years, and I still have no idea what to say. I mean, I am an alcoholic, but I don’t drink. So I call myself a ‘non-practicing’ alcoholic, but I’d like something cool.



  29. Amazing post. This is something that has been bothering me over the last month. I’m 27 and decided to stop drinking a month ago. I don’t know if you have read “Kick the Drink… Easily” but it is a great read for anyone who likes to look at things logically. It talks a lot about how ridiculous it is to have to defend not drinking, and I love your comparison to coffee, because there is such a double-standard. I expect to face my first challenge of having to say no to alcohol this weekend, but I’m confident it will go well. Thanks so much for your honesty. I love your blog. Aquifer sounds good to me!


    • Good luck to you, I found this blog and it has been helpful in so many ways. I’m turning 31 this year and am struggling with this change in my life. I’ve fallen off the wagon and fooled myself into thinking I can be a ” normal drinker” with every mistake and realization I feel I’m getting closer to the person I want to become. I hate being asked why over and over for not having a drink in my hand. It’s scary but oh well. Trying to keep my head up. Take care!


  30. Would you call a woman who doesn’t drink & has kids a Mother Mocker?


  31. Know your pain! I am unfortunately off the wagon at present. Or rather I am holding onto the back of the wagon with one hand, legs dragging along, knees worn through. But I enjoy your blog and still read it. I hope to be back soon.

    When I was sitting in the drivers seat of the wagon I just used to say; “No thanks I don’t drink for health reasons”. Sounds a tad pompous, so I would alternate with “I’m a health nut”. These arent lies, it’s true I did quit for the health of my body and my mind after all.

    This used to give me the upper hand and make everyone else at the table feel guilty for plying themselves with alcohol, and the conversation turned to how great I was and how they wished they could do it too, everyone else started to confess. Depending on the audience, I could choose to elborate into my alcoholism or not. My choice. Worked for me.


  32. Love this! Coffee is a ritual to me as well. I dead having to explain to everyone why I’m not drinking. Still figuring that one out. This made me laugh, and that feels nice.


  33. Hah! YES!! That’s the spirit, everyone. Ooooh…”spirits” – there’s a word to play with……


  34. Fabbers unite!!!!!!!!! How utterly fabulous. Love it. xxxx


  35. Lovely to see a post from you again pickly. It’s been awhile and I was just looking at back posts of your blog last night as it happens. Rock on! I’d love to hear more about what changes two years have brought for you and why and how it gets easier sometime.

    I love this! I shall be mulling this over. I love Aquifier. I hate all the current words – all have a ring of parsimony and boringness about them. We need to inject some fun and, damnit, dare I say it, a sense of joyful self righteousness into this. We’ve removed one little thing to great benefit – why the constant need to justify it and/or feel bad for not doing it? (Though, yes, admittedly I used to look down on those who didn’t drink too – I assumed they were either boring and uptight or AA converts. So I get it. I just hate it now that it’s me on the other side of the fence – or trying hard to be.)

    I’m an Ab Fabber
    I’m Totes into Tea. A Tea-Totally?
    A Mockerino


  36. I love this post! I’ve been thinking a lot about this too. I would love for when my kids go off to college that not drinking is a fine, normal, cool thing to do. sobriety is the new black!


  37. HA! I’m calling myself a Fabber from now on 😉


  38. What a breath of fresh farking air you are! My goodness, and yours too! Thank you, Thank you, and Thank you again for putting into written words what has been niggling at my cerebral cortex for sometime. Not drinking alcohol is NOT who I am, it’s something I choose to experience. Call me whatever you want, ‘good’ or ‘bad’, a label simply allows me to categorize an aspect of my behaviour, or yours, for that matter.
    In the spirit of the fun that this blog is I am going with AquaFabMockulous!

    I am laughing on the inside and the outside too. A big whoop and a HELL YEAH!

    Keep ’em coming cause I am on the reframe train with you!

    Cheers, T -aka AFM


  1. Pingback: Silly, Fun-Loving, Creative Seeks Sober | One Too Many

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The Blog

The latest news on and the WordPress community.

The Truth of Being Me

Memories, Moments & Mid-Life of a Woman, Survivor & Fighter

Finding a Sober Miracle

A woman's quest for one year of sobriety

Unbeaching the Whale

A recovery journey

A Beautiful Mess

Embracing the beautiful mess God created me to be

Anna Bananas

I might be crazy, but at least I'm sober

mistakes by the lake

sit down. let me tell you a story about ohmygod what am I doing?


a creative outlet + nonlinear collection of musings on unlearning how to destroy and remembering how to create. designed to enlighten, empower and humor.


who knew life would be better????

Total Fatty

Escaping my escape mechanisms.

Hurrah for coffee!

My new sober adventure!


How I Secretly Quit My Secret Habit of Secretly Drinking

Honeybee Living

How I Secretly Quit My Secret Habit of Secretly Drinking

suburban betty

clean & serene

Heya, Monster.

A SoberBlog by a TallWoman.

A Spiritual Evolution

Alcoholism recovery in light of a Near Death Experience

life without vodka rocks

Quitting alcohol on my own terms


living without alcohol, living again

Seeing Clear Lee

musings on becoming alcohol-free

The Truth About Alcohol

We Are Not Alcoholics and we Refuse to be Anonymous

My Road To Abstinence

Sober, me? Really?


Trying to ace sober living


Today is the first day of the rest of my life. Starting today I am on my way.

The Six Year Hangover


And Everything Afterwards

How I quit alcohol and discovered the beauty of a sober life

Raising Healthy Children in an Alcoholic Home

A Book and Blog for Parents in Recovery from Alcoholism and Codependence

Finding myself by leaving wine behind...


From daily wine drinker to alcohol free living...this is my journey.

Sober Courage

A journey from liquid courage to sober courage

Mrs D Is Going Without

How I Secretly Quit My Secret Habit of Secretly Drinking

A hangover free life

Waking up to the sobering reality that booze is the problem not the solution


Mixed-up, Mashed-up, Mished-up.


I got sober. Life got big.

Sober Grace

Finding and practicing grace in recovery


There are no coincidences.

Sober Identity

#Life Coach #50+ Years #Striving #Thriving #Emerge: Growing From Addiction-Starter's Guide" #AfterRehabCoaching

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